Another snippet of another conversation I had the other day.

Female friend: I’m going to the gym.
Me: Be sure to stretch, you’ll need to be limber for tonight. I don’t want you pulling a muscle…unless it’s mine.
Friend: Sorry…I’m in the middle of something.
Me: I’m trying to do the same.
Friend: You’re crazy.
Me: Relax, I’m just trying to loosen you up. Poor choice of words probably.
Friend: I’m not stressed.
Me: I guess the only thing left to do is get it on…heavily…for a long time.
Friend: Sounds interesting.
Me: As do the positions I’m thinking of putting you in.

I love being a dirty old man.